New research from the experts at online dating platform eharmony reveals that 15% of the newly-single population take just a week to get back into ‘the dating game’ and many Britons believe that quantity is the key to love – with over a third (39%) thinking the more dates they go on, the more chance they have of finding the one.
These actions, as well as other traits discovered by the research, have led eharmony to dub the pattern of behaviours the casual dating cycle, which lead singles to find themselves stuck in a cycle of never-ending and unsatisfying dates; or, put more simply, ‘spinning’. Dr Linda, renowned psychologist and bestselling author with over 17 years’ experience, has broken this cycle down into six stages to help frustrated romantics identify where they might be going wrong this summer:
- The Sign-up
The cycle begins when those who are newly single decide that they are ready to find love again. This is the point where singles decide to sign up to online dating platforms or even reactivate old profiles they may have had. 44% of Brits reactivate their online dating profiles within three months of breaking off their previous relationship, and 15% do this within just one week.
- The Quantity Fallacy
According to Dr Linda, many single Brits fall into the trap of thinking that the more dates they go on, the more likely they are to find what they are looking for – The Quantity Fallacy – which is simply not true.
- The Hollywood Complex
‘The Quantity Fallacy’ has in turn led to singles looking for the wrong thing and failing to take the time to focus on whether they are truly compatible with others they come across on online dating sites and apps. The research shows that a startling 77% of people report physical appearance as being in the top three most important factors when searching for love.
Many singles looking for love online, now find themselves embarking on a series of short-lived and unsuccessful relationships. While it is popular to blame this means of soul-mate searching, the reality is that finding meaningful relationships requires each person to be in the right mindset. Nearly a third of people who have met someone online fail to ever make it past the six-month mark and half of 18-34-year olds have not had a relationship with someone they have met online that has lasted any longer than a year.
- Rejection Dejection
Bad dates are disheartening and after a series of them, along with a string of past unsuccessful online relationships, many singles start to feel dejected and worry whether they’ll be able to find love. According to the research this feeling doesn’t take long – nearly a third report feeling dejected after just three or fewer bad dates.
- Dating Burnout
Dating burnout can be a common feeling experienced by those who are actively looking for love, such is the time, resource and emotional energy that goes into the crucial task of finding a life partner. After a number of bad dates, 1 in 5 people report that they would give up online dating entirely and over a third report needing to take a break.
Rachael Lloyd, eharmony spokesperson, comments: “While in the short-term picking someone purely on physical attraction might seem exciting, our research shows that selecting a partner based primarily on looks and superficial traits tends to lead to disappointment. It also tends to spur casual dating cycles as people spin between options.
“At eharmony we take finding love seriously, bringing singles into a community of like-minded people. We match them using an intelligent compatibility according to core values and personality traits which are highly predictive of happy, enduring relationships – helping our users enjoy a long and lasting intimacy that, hopefully, goes well beyond the summer!”
- 15% reactivate dating profiles within just a week after a break up
- Over a third play ‘the numbers game’, thinking the more dates the better changes of finding love
- ‘Hollywood complex’ at play as three-quarters prioritise looks as vital part of love
eharmony launched in the UK in 2008 with a clear vision: to create more lasting love in the world. The experts at eharmony use an intelligent compatibility matching system (CMS) to match singles, according to 18 bespoke dimensions of compatibility. These are powerful indicators of relationship satisfaction. Today eharmony, fondly know as ‘the brains behind the butterflies’, proudly serves a like-minded community of 60 million members globally and has amassed 5 million registered users in Britain.